So, recently we found out that there is a wolf in our neighbourhood. Chris and I have always talked about what animals may be living in the woods around our area. Deer, wild turkeys and of course raccoons...which we have seen many times, and in our part of the province, wolves.
Every Wednesday night, we put out our garbage and recycling in a central area in our parking lot. My mother asked us, "Aren't you worried that some animals will get into the garbage?" Chris and I both said "Nah." There was never an incident like that before. We did have a raccoon visit our backyard on a few occasions and it helped itself to our garbage can before Chris fashioned a very high-tech security system with bungee cords and a broken hockey stick. "Nice action," I praised Chris. "I haven't seen our backyard pet in a while." Until I saw him flattened on the road behind our building. Poor little thing.
Thursday morning arrives and Chris and I are heading to the car. We rounded the corner and we were in awe of the scene before our eyes. Garbage was torn to bits. Plastic bags were shredded. We had a first hand glimpse at our neighbours refuse and who the guilty parties were that did not recycle. It was a mess. We slowly drove by the wreckage and said to ourselves that the garbage men were not going to pick this shit up. And none of the people here will own up to the mess. It's just going to remain an eye sore.
As we drove to Chris' work, he mentioned that it may have been done by wolves. I couldn't believe that. "I've never heard howling at night," I said to him. "He could be a rogue wolf without a pack," was his response. And that was the end of the conversation.
The next day, I was returning home from work when I noticed my neighbour sitting on her front steps. "Did you hear that we had a wolf visit our parking lot?" "Are you kidding me?" I asked, completely in shock. "Yeah, I was coming home from work around 3 am and I noticed the wolf in the garbage. I stood behind my car and the wolf just stared at me, then ran away." I started to feel uncomfortable about the fact that the wolf got so close to us. And know it knows that we are a potential food source. Come visit our all-you-can-eat buffet! Great.
I walked in the house and told my mother. She got worried. "It's very scary where you live, that's why I'm not very adventurous with my walking around here." "Oh mother," I said to her. You can't reason with her. Once she has something set in her mind, that becomes law.
Fast forward to last night, I forced Chris to take out our recycling for today. We didn't have very much garbage so there was no point in taking it out. My mother turned to us and said "Your fence is not very high, aren't you worried the wolf will come into your backyard and try to get in the house?" What?!? "So what if it came into our backyard. It wouldn't be the first time a creature has done that. And how on earth is it going to come in the house?" I said to my mother. "It's not like they have posable thumbs. They can't unlock doors." Chris responded in his usual, sarcastic way. I couldn't help but laugh. My poor mother.
Last night I was awakened by a sound coming from downstairs. I strained to hear for a bit but nothing happened. I kept wondering if Chris had locked the back door. I thought someone may have entered the house and no, I didn't think it was a wolf. Although my mind started to drift and I wondered if someone would try and poison some of their garbage to kill the wolf.
I imagined walking out to the parking lot and seeing the wreckage again but this time the suspect was there, lying dead on its side. Everyone in our neighbourhood was standing around talking about the scene. I ran back to the house and yelled at Chris to get the cameras. And, the sick bastards that we are, ran over to the wolf like a couple of crazed tourists, and started taking pictures. I turned to Chris with a look as if to say "What the hell is wrong with us?" He just looked at me and said, "It's for evidence." Oh, of course!
Can you guess what we saw this morning? Our little visitor graced our parking lot yet again. Garbage everywhere. I looked at the mess and tried to make sense of it. If it wasn't for the wolf, all the other little creatures could not benefit from the smorgasbord that is our garbage buffet. I did get a little satisfaction knowing that our garbage was not part of the mess and therefore it wasn't our fault. So I guess it's OK.
Chris suggested we stake out our parking lot next Wednesday night to catch a glimpse. I'll keep y'all posted on this genius idea.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Come, take a stroll in my world
Welcome to my blog. I hope you enjoy reading the strange tidbits of weirdness that seem to creep into my mind which I feel the need to share with people. Random thoughts and whatnot...even the odd dream or two...if I can remember them. For example, this one:
I was in a mall. A bit frustrated about this fact because I work in a mall and I try very hard not to be in a mall on my days off...yet, here I am in a mall in my dream. Walking around, not really sure what i was looking for, when I saw a large group of people, fighting and arguing. As I got closer, I noticed that some of the men were police officers, security guards and loss prevention members from my store. They had rounded up a bunch of thugs and were arresting them. I assumed they were a gang of shoplifters. As I glanced around this mass of testosterone, I noticed one of the loss prevention guys I work with. I asked him "Was this some kind of sting operation?"with a laugh. He said "They escaped from prison." Oh.
If you knew me, you would know that I am a very inquisitive person. Apparently not in my dreams. I just continued on my way. The next thing I realized was that I was standing in my department at work...working. I just can't seem to get away from that place.
An odd looking fellow, maybe in his twenties, came up to me at the register and asked me about gift cards and how much money he had on his card. He was very nervous...looking around for something or someone. I usually have pretty good hunches about people and kept my eye on him. He then asked me if I knew where Sheila was? I couldn't for the life of me figure out who he was talking about. There was no Sheila in my department. Then I realized she worked in Fragrances. Which is what I told him. Then I saw he approaching my department. She stops by to chat for a while. When he walked up to her, I noticed that she was surprised to see him and she signaled for him to wait for her somewhere else.
More red flags were popping up in my mind. What were Sheila and this odd man up to? He walked away and her and I chatted for a bit. But I really wanted to call security to give them a heads up. About what...I don't know. From where I was standing, I noticed two women come up to this odd guy and a heated exchange took place. I had to call security but I didn't want Sheila to know. So I made up an excuse to step away.
For the life of me, I couldn't find a phone that was available! I was freaking out! Everything looked different. I finally found a one and called security but they said they couldn't do anything because they were in the middle of something already. Fine! Just my luck.
I started to make my way back to my department, totally confused about where I was. All of a sudden, I was face to face with the same group of thugs from the other mall. I stood there for what felt like ages looking at this scene. Didn't I just go through this?
This time I saw Shan, our old LP manager. He was in the middle of putting cuffs on one of them when I got closer. "Hey Shan, what's going on?" I asked...as if I couln't figure it out. "These guys escaped from prison...the cops asked for our help." he said, out of breath, struggling to put the cuffs on this mean looking dude. "Oh," I said, without a care. "Can you help us?" he asked. I was shocked by the request but a little excited as well. I'm all about getting the bad guys. I agreed to help and somehow found myself leading this group of thugs, handcuffed to one another, down this long corridor, into a freight elevator to some underground bunker.
We entered this massive concrete room with nothing but this makeshift cage in the middle. Shan and I led the thugs into the cage. As we started to remove the cuffs, it dawned on me that we were not protected from them at all. They could have easily turned on us but they didn't. As Shan removed the last cuff, he turned to me and said "These guys won't get away this time." Just as I was about to ask what he meant, a small door on one of the walls opened and a dozen rabid, angry and hungry hyenas bolted out towards the cage. I noticed there were some holes in the cage, with what appeared to be pickles dangling from each hole, which seemed to entice the hyenas. Go figure. "Sooner or later, there guys are all going to die," Shan looked at me. "If they try to escape, the dogs will be on them. But the more pickles that are put in the holes, the bigger the holes get as they try to claw at them. Eventually they will be in the cage with us," he said this with a sad look on his face. I looked at him and all I could think of was 'What about you and me'? Then I woke up.
I never said it was going to be pretty.
I was in a mall. A bit frustrated about this fact because I work in a mall and I try very hard not to be in a mall on my days off...yet, here I am in a mall in my dream. Walking around, not really sure what i was looking for, when I saw a large group of people, fighting and arguing. As I got closer, I noticed that some of the men were police officers, security guards and loss prevention members from my store. They had rounded up a bunch of thugs and were arresting them. I assumed they were a gang of shoplifters. As I glanced around this mass of testosterone, I noticed one of the loss prevention guys I work with. I asked him "Was this some kind of sting operation?"with a laugh. He said "They escaped from prison." Oh.
If you knew me, you would know that I am a very inquisitive person. Apparently not in my dreams. I just continued on my way. The next thing I realized was that I was standing in my department at work...working. I just can't seem to get away from that place.
An odd looking fellow, maybe in his twenties, came up to me at the register and asked me about gift cards and how much money he had on his card. He was very nervous...looking around for something or someone. I usually have pretty good hunches about people and kept my eye on him. He then asked me if I knew where Sheila was? I couldn't for the life of me figure out who he was talking about. There was no Sheila in my department. Then I realized she worked in Fragrances. Which is what I told him. Then I saw he approaching my department. She stops by to chat for a while. When he walked up to her, I noticed that she was surprised to see him and she signaled for him to wait for her somewhere else.
More red flags were popping up in my mind. What were Sheila and this odd man up to? He walked away and her and I chatted for a bit. But I really wanted to call security to give them a heads up. About what...I don't know. From where I was standing, I noticed two women come up to this odd guy and a heated exchange took place. I had to call security but I didn't want Sheila to know. So I made up an excuse to step away.
For the life of me, I couldn't find a phone that was available! I was freaking out! Everything looked different. I finally found a one and called security but they said they couldn't do anything because they were in the middle of something already. Fine! Just my luck.
I started to make my way back to my department, totally confused about where I was. All of a sudden, I was face to face with the same group of thugs from the other mall. I stood there for what felt like ages looking at this scene. Didn't I just go through this?
This time I saw Shan, our old LP manager. He was in the middle of putting cuffs on one of them when I got closer. "Hey Shan, what's going on?" I asked...as if I couln't figure it out. "These guys escaped from prison...the cops asked for our help." he said, out of breath, struggling to put the cuffs on this mean looking dude. "Oh," I said, without a care. "Can you help us?" he asked. I was shocked by the request but a little excited as well. I'm all about getting the bad guys. I agreed to help and somehow found myself leading this group of thugs, handcuffed to one another, down this long corridor, into a freight elevator to some underground bunker.
We entered this massive concrete room with nothing but this makeshift cage in the middle. Shan and I led the thugs into the cage. As we started to remove the cuffs, it dawned on me that we were not protected from them at all. They could have easily turned on us but they didn't. As Shan removed the last cuff, he turned to me and said "These guys won't get away this time." Just as I was about to ask what he meant, a small door on one of the walls opened and a dozen rabid, angry and hungry hyenas bolted out towards the cage. I noticed there were some holes in the cage, with what appeared to be pickles dangling from each hole, which seemed to entice the hyenas. Go figure. "Sooner or later, there guys are all going to die," Shan looked at me. "If they try to escape, the dogs will be on them. But the more pickles that are put in the holes, the bigger the holes get as they try to claw at them. Eventually they will be in the cage with us," he said this with a sad look on his face. I looked at him and all I could think of was 'What about you and me'? Then I woke up.
I never said it was going to be pretty.
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